We spoke a few weeks ago about how some people treat staffing agencies as a café, with a menu of job offerings ready to go in three minutes flat. I recently hired a lady for a part-time position, and the experience again struck me with its eerie similarity to the Great American Restaurant Experience.
Which one, you ask?
You know the friend who always changes his/her mind? The one who is craving a chicken salad. Or maybe it’s the salmon. Or maybe its’s the avocado club sandwich. Or maybe it’s the MAKE UP YOUR F***ING MIND AND ORDER ALREADY!!! Then, once the order is finally done and you have relaxed your grip on the fork you had been contemplating stabbing into the back of the hand closest to you, he/she starts up again with the dithering about what he/she SHOULD have ordered.
[unclenches fist and takes a deep breath]
Yeah. That would be the one.
As I said, I recently hired a lady for a part-time position, got her through the hiring process, and cleared her to start the assignment the following Monday. Our typical process involves a check-in the Friday just prior to the start of an assignment to discuss first day details. During that conversation, I reminded her that the position is a contract-to-hire, and she will be working as a contractor until such time the client decides they would like to convert her to a permanent staff member. The lady says she understands and is fine with all that, so we conclude our conversation, and I send the usual follow-up email with all the details. The lady (surprisingly) emails back to confirm receipt, and I congratulate myself for a successful mission accomplished.
Monday rolls around. I am armed with an extra-large hot chocolate with whip (don’t judge me on a Monday) and ready to take on the world right—right after I finish the daily Wordle. Three attempts in, no green letters to be had, and my hot chocolate cooling rapidly, I get an email from this lady an hour before she is supposed to start stating that she "decided she needs a permanent position and cannot take a job as a contractor at this time."
You couldn't have figured that out before now? Seriously? Come on. You were fine three days ago, but suddenly you decide you can't take the job because it's not permanent?
Let’s take a break for a moment. Are you, by any chance, a believer in alternate universes? I am. I believe that every time we make a decision, another universe is created and spins off into infinity wherein everyone that existed at that very moment in time goes about their lives, impacted only by the fact that I took the opposite decision I took in this universe. And, just to confirm I’m not a complete self-absorbed dolt: Yes, there are an infinite number of mes out there in the world, impacted by the opposite decisions that an infinite number of others made.
Anyway. I read that email and had an out-of-body experience wherein I appreciated that there were so many potential avenues to explore at that moment in time. The contract position is only part-time (four whole hours/day), leaving plenty of time during the rest of your day to continue a job hunt for a permanent placement elsewhere. Why the hell would you just decide to NOT work at all because it's not a permanent position? Would not making money on a contract-to-hire position be better than not making money at all? And you can still look for a permanent job WHILE you're working and making money at the contract-to-hire position...I mean, if you're a solid worker (and maybe not too motivated to find another job right away), there is the possibility of getting converted into a permanent position from a contractor before you land yourself an actual permanent job elsewhere.
However, rather than explore ANY of that, I took a sip of my (now tepid) hot chocolate, grit my teeth and swing for the fence on Wordle Attempt Number Four.
"WASTE”
Pretty much. A waste of time.
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