We've discussed resumes several times...or, at least, I'm pretty sure we have. Maybe I've discussed them with you in my head, but it never made it to a post.
[spends a minute scrolling through past posts]
Well, whatever. We all (hopefully) know what a resume is: An overview of your work history detailing experience/skills that a potential employer will look at when you apply for a job. Some people put actual time and effort into their resume while I've seen others that are illegibly scribbled out in pink ink on a crumpled piece of notebook paper that looks like it got fished out of a kitchen trashcan after a meal of spaghetti and meatballs was thrown out.
Then again, I suppose hand writing a resume on spaghetti paper could be considered “actual” time and effort for some people, too, what with finding a pen that actually works and some form of paper somewhere...but I digress.
I spoke to a lady recently who had applied for a position (obviously) that required the supervisor to review the resume prior to scheduling an in-person interview. Standard stuff, but when I asked her for a resume, things got a bit odd:
Me: Do you have an updated resume that we can send over to the supervisor for consideration?
Resume (to henceforth be referred to as 'R'): What?
Me: An updated resume. The supervisor reviews resumes before determining with whom they would like to schedule an interview.
R: <after several moments of silence> What kind of resume?
Me: <an equal number of moments of silence> I'm not...Um...One that details your work history and experience.
R: Ok, but what kind?
Me: Preferably one that's typed and lists your past jobs, when you were there, and what you did. I don't think there's another 'kind.'
R: Oh. I thought I had to make one up that matched the job.
Me: <thinking 'matched the job? what?'> I'll just note that you do not have a resume. Let's move on...
Sometimes I'm a kind soul and will make a brief resume for someone who is able to give me his/her work history and walk me through what he/she did during past jobs, but I'm not interested in spending much time on someone who was going to make up a resume to 'match the job.'
[And, dear reader, don’t get me started on the difference between tailoring a resume to highlight certain skills versus making something up. She was going to make something up. No doubt. Let’s accept the reality and move on with the point.]
I’m not going to pretend she was the first or last person in the history of the job hunt to make something up, but it is probably not a good idea to announce that you'll be fabricating a resume as though you are the new writer for the latest comedy series on NBC.
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